She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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