Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
