Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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