omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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