"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Randomize
