party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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