marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
