Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Randomize
