Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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