I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
