Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
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