Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
