so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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