i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
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