hell yes lets make some ravioli
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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