Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize