hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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