Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
