I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize