i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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