May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
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