You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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