My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
