we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
