I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
