what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
