So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
