Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
