My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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