Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Randomize
