And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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