Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
