Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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