when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
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