They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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