she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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