Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize
