he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
