The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
