I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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