So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
