hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Randomize
