Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
smell my finger.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize
