one might say we're banned from that church
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize