why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
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