We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
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