fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
