i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
