I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
