i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
